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Here's some things we found from a 2001 archive:

The Antiquer News - November 5th, 2000

ANTIQUE BANDIT GOING OUT OF BUSINESS?

Confused? So is everyone else. "World-renound" text adventure creator, Antique Bandit Interactive, appears to be on its last legs. So, why exactly is it releasing another product? Granted, said product promises to be the best robot chatroom companion ever. Like we even need something like that.

The C.E.O. of Antique Bandit promises to continue to run the company even behind closed doors, despite the company having recently filed for bankruptcy.

"We will release the Admina chatbot companion," the C.E.O. said on November 4th. "After that? Well, due to the bankruptcy, we only have a little while to bring the business back into the area of profit. Meaning that we'll have to operate with our doors closed. It might sound like something out of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, but I assure everyone that it is an entirely-buyable situation. We will be sure to make our triumphant return, whether that be 20 years from now or 120!"

Everyone else at the company has refused to comment. The C.E.O. says that there's a chance some employees will have to be let go. This marks a "somber time" in the game making industry, but it is believed that the C.E.O.'s enthusiasm has already made an impact, as the employees at Antique Bandit Interactive are already excited to be working on new projects, according to an interview last month.

Whether or not the company will succeed has yet to be seen. Some rumors have been circulating that suggest Antique Bandit is working on an AI of sorts . . .

Did you enjoy your service from admina today? Because we like to be inclusive, we have decided to forego any employee names and just use a universal username.

Are you excited for the Year 2000, but you can't find an exciting way to bring in the New Year? Antique Bandit Interactive has the solution for you! Introducing our brand new, batch-based, Y-2-K Countdown and Fireworks Display! Forget about standing outside in some cold city or lighting those pesky fireworks! With the Antique Bandit Interactive Y-2-K Countdown and Fireworks Display! you can sit at home, relax, and watch as our countdown, which is synced directly to your local time works its magic on your home computer. and when the time finally arrives, your computer screen will be covered in binary code that the entire family can enjoy! While it might seem boring at first, we assure you that this will be the wave of the future. This counter can be used year after year, and it is sure to become a family tradition!

Do you absolutely love admina? Need help with everything in your busy life? Introducing the Antique Bandit Interactive admina Personal Assistant! admina is different from all other personal assistants on the market because she actually listens to you. She even likes to spy on people. That's just for pretend, of course! Get ready to buy your very own admina Personal Assistant (APA) and regain control of your life!

The Antiquer News - November 5th, 1996

INTRODUCING SSMB LOCAL 47: ANTIQUE BANIT'S OWN TV STATION?

Yes, you read right. No, your eyes are not deceiving you. According to the newly-appointed C.E.O., Joesph Erbit, the company has decided to expand to the television industry following some "successful games."

"People always say not to put all your chickens in one basket," the C.E.O. told one of our reporters yesterday. "Sure, owning a local TV station might seem a bit out there at first, but Antique Bandit Interactive is sure to make their television station a resounding success."

"I've never even heard of them," Paul Thyme, a local resident of the area, said. "Of course, that might simply be due to them not having the best exposure, although I feel like I would have heard about them before, if their games are such a success."

We look forward to seeing how the new TV station will pay off.

The Antiquer News - November 5th, 2001

SSMB LOCAL 47 BEING DISCONTINUED!

It is a "sad" time, as Antique Bandit Interactive has had to "unfortunately" discontinue their TV station a full year after they filed for bankrupty. This would appear to be another tactic they're using to simply stay in business on the surface, but the CEO says otherwise.

"Believe it or not, the TV station has been making plenty of money even as the internet grows its reach," the C.E.O. said November 3rd. "The problem is, we kept running into incidents. While they weren't too major, there was a couple of times when we accidentally scared some kids, causing us to lose some customers. Seeing as I was the one to put the plan of a TV station into action, I feel it is my responsibility to take it down to protect our beautiful customers."

We were unable to reach out to anyone else at the time.

The Antiquer News - November 7th, 1916

TIME TRAVEL EXISTS?

The world seemingly stands still as scientists from all across the globe attempt to deconstruct a mysterious object brought in by a mysterious man who claimed he could time travel before walking out of a house and disappearing. Mysterious. Of course, scientists aren't worried about silly time travel, instead being fascinated by the rather-simple looking object the man brought with him.

The object was brought to - of all people - Mr. Bandit, who says it's some sort of "computer." He says the word is derived from the root word of compute.

"It apparently computes equations more easily and quickly than what a person or even a team could do by hand," Mr. Bandit told us on the 6th. "He said it was called the C3, but I couldn't get anything more out of the 'time traveler' before he ran outside of my house and disappeared. His appearence was abnormal; he had what I could only guess was a wristwatch, but it had a shiny screen with fingerprints on it, and there was little symbols that seemed to glow brightly in the dark night."

We hope to see more of these shenanigans in the future.

Archive Created: November 5th, 2001. Retrieved: November 5th, 2004.

Note: The date of 1999-2010 on the website might not reflect how long the company has actually been active.

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